I'm a loser, baby, so why don't you kill me...
Why today, you ask? I'm writing this wearing one of my costumes from Urinetown that came in the mail today. I was a little excited to get them and they actually fit, so I'm kind of excited. Plus in the one dress all the jokes about my chest might actually read. Sweet.
Speaking of Urinetown, this entry may just have a theme for once. Assorted musings concerning the musical.
A) We aren't ready. And we are not collectively good enough to be messing around as much as we do. At least I know I'm not good enough to not need every second of rehearsal time they can give me. I'm turning into the actor-bitch I was during Footloose. I just want things to be as good as they can be. And that means staying focused. I shouldn't be saying this to a journal, I should be saying it in a constructive way to my fellow castmates instead of snapping. Soon.
B) Sometimes I secretly have more fun at tech than rehearsal. I'm not quite sure why. Maybe it's the constant productivity that is evident aside from the goofing around. The visible progress that I don't see with the show itself. Whatever the reason, "Girls Building Shit" (and it's many sequels)are rapidly becoming the parts of my week about which I get most excited. (Sad that I took the time to figure out how to not end that sentence with a preposition.)
C) I need to learn to say "no." I can't walk away. Ever. I'm going to get myself rundown and screw things up but here I was again today instead of taking the afternoon to sleep I set up for the haunted house for six hours. It's just too much, logically - but I don't want to miss a thing. I'm like a three year old that won't go to bed for fear of being left out. Grow up.
In other news, I flirted with someone brand new the other day. Not even a La Salle person. And he flirted back. It was blissful. No, there was no information exchange, but it was like there didn't need to be. I just needed to know that when I can find some time, I will be able to get back in the game. Or whatever.
I thought about writing in this for a long time but now I have no idea where else to go. I've used up all my words for today. When I find more, I'll find you.
Speaking of Urinetown, this entry may just have a theme for once. Assorted musings concerning the musical.
A) We aren't ready. And we are not collectively good enough to be messing around as much as we do. At least I know I'm not good enough to not need every second of rehearsal time they can give me. I'm turning into the actor-bitch I was during Footloose. I just want things to be as good as they can be. And that means staying focused. I shouldn't be saying this to a journal, I should be saying it in a constructive way to my fellow castmates instead of snapping. Soon.
B) Sometimes I secretly have more fun at tech than rehearsal. I'm not quite sure why. Maybe it's the constant productivity that is evident aside from the goofing around. The visible progress that I don't see with the show itself. Whatever the reason, "Girls Building Shit" (and it's many sequels)are rapidly becoming the parts of my week about which I get most excited. (Sad that I took the time to figure out how to not end that sentence with a preposition.)
C) I need to learn to say "no." I can't walk away. Ever. I'm going to get myself rundown and screw things up but here I was again today instead of taking the afternoon to sleep I set up for the haunted house for six hours. It's just too much, logically - but I don't want to miss a thing. I'm like a three year old that won't go to bed for fear of being left out. Grow up.
In other news, I flirted with someone brand new the other day. Not even a La Salle person. And he flirted back. It was blissful. No, there was no information exchange, but it was like there didn't need to be. I just needed to know that when I can find some time, I will be able to get back in the game. Or whatever.
I thought about writing in this for a long time but now I have no idea where else to go. I've used up all my words for today. When I find more, I'll find you.
posted by Pam @ 10:51 PM
1 Comments:
At 12:58 PM,
Jess said…
Hey Pam,
I can relate with everything you just wrote. At one point or another, I felt that way in the weeks leading up to a show. Everyone was goofing off and not learning their parts, tech was like a vacation away from the show, and despite the exhaustion, there was no way I was skipping out on anything. Not to mention how excited I would get (still get...hehe) when some random guy started flirting. As if there was any time for random men in the weeks before a show!
Hang in there. From what I saw with "Shakespeare", you'll do great. And don't worry about being a little bitchy sometimes - you're doing it cause you care, and if you approach it in the right way, people will see that and shape up. Or you could just lock them all in the greenroom and play ALL the parts - it's an option. :-)
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